In 2024, The MedCommons conducted a Physician Spouse Experience Survey, aiming to gather more data on how being the spouse or partner of a physician affects them.
Data gathered from our survey results provide valuable insight into a space where research to this point has been minimal to non-existent. We believe, and are encouraged, data like this and studies by those such as Sarah Grimmer, PhD and Lisa Muehlenbein, PhD are beginning to highlight the impact medicine has on spouses and partners.
Before sharing our findings, it’s important to highlight a critical pattern: According to the 2024 Medscape Physician Burnout & Depression Report:
- 78% of physicians reported that they rely on spending time with family and friends to maintain their happiness and mental health.
- Over 73% say their burnout negatively impacted their personal relationships.
Given the recent Grimmer and Muehlenbein studies, which report that the ripple effects of physician burnout often extend to their spouses and partners, we all must ask an important question: How can we effectively address the well-being crisis when burnt-out physicians turn to equally burnt-out spouses and partners for support?
As healthcare leaders begin to take a more holistic approach to well-being, aiming to understand this cycle and its impact on physician families, there’s hope they will take meaningful action to support spouses and partners—the primary support system for physicians.
Impact on Marriages
60% of spouses/partners say their marriage is “just okay,” 20% say it’s been great, while another 20% describe it as miserable.
The pressures of a physician’s career can leave little room for prioritizing the marital relationship and the survey results reflect this reality. Most spouses/partners find their marriages are simply managing, while only a small percentage report true satisfaction. These numbers further demonstrate why it’s essential to understand the impact on physician families and how providing support to the family system as a whole is necessary to improve overall physician well-being.
What can be done?
Healthcare Systems/Medical Programs:
Provide family-focused well-being initiatives that acknowledge the impact of a physician’s career on relationships. Prioritize the inclusion of spouses/partners in well-being programs to reinforce the importance of family stability. Check out these resources for ideas.
Medspouses/Partners:
In addition to prioritizing regular quality time with your spouse to nurture your relationship, make it a priority to communicate openly about your needs and concerns. If you’re scared to bring it up then it means you probably should. As much as possible, establish routines that help balance your relationship with the demands of medical life.
Physicians:
Acknowledge the toll your career takes on your marriage and make time for your spouse. Regularly check in and be open about balancing work and family life. Show appreciation for your spouse’s role in your career and life.
Loneliness and Social Isolation
72% of physician spouses/partners report feeling lonely and over 58% say they feel socially isolated.
It’s no wonder that spouses and partners feel socially isolated and lonely, with physicians often working 80+ hours a week during training, managing EHRs, and more. We recognize this is the nature of the career. That being said, it’s proven clear that the happiness of the spouse or partner is a significant factor in physician retention and turnover – both of which are quite costly. The question is, how can healthcare systems help alleviate this social isolation, even though it’s inherent to training?
What can be done?
Healthcare Systems/Medical Programs:
Recognizing the challenges physician spouses/partners face as it relates to loneliness and fostering understanding can be a starting point. Targeted efforts to create strong support networks—both locally and online—can help bridge this gap and provide a sense of community. Prioritize and invest in these networks specifically for physician spouses/partners to build connections. Organize social events or online groups that reduce isolation and foster community. Incorporate resources like The MedCommons Circle into well-being initiatives, offering spouses a way to connect with others in similar situations.
Medspouses/Partners:
When possible, reach out to other physician families to build a support system. Join The MedCommons Circle or local groups where you can connect with others who understand your experience. Share your feelings with others to combat isolation and find solidarity.
Physicians:
Acknowledge your spouse/partner’s loneliness and encourage them to engage with others outside of work. Help facilitate their participation in support networks. Make time for shared activities that promote social connections outside of your career.
Mental Health Challenges
60% of respondents are burnt out and 46% report feeling depressed.
The impact of stress, burnout, and depression on physician spouses and partners is significant, as also highlighted in both the Grimmer study and Muehlenbein dissertation. They not only experience the effects of the physician’s burnout but are often so focused on supporting the demands of their partner’s career that their own mental health is overlooked.
While it may not be possible to provide mental health services or eliminate all stress that comes from life in medicine, it isn’t difficult or costly to be more attentive to the needs of spouses and partners. Even small efforts can go a long way in improving their mental health and overall well-being.
What can be done?
Healthcare Systems/Medical Programs:
Good communication, involvement in wellness initiatives, and supporting the family unit can go a long way in improving a spouse/partner’s mental health. Promote and nurture social connections, which has been shown to significantly improve overall mental health. Including them in orientation is a simple and impactful way to set their expectations and prepare them for what’s ahead.
Medspouses/Partners:
Set boundaries to protect your mental health and recognize when you need support. Practice self-care and seek professional help if you’re feeling overwhelmed. Prioritize your mental well-being by engaging in activities that help you recharge.
Physicians:
Be proactive in checking in on your spouse’s emotional well-being. Encourage them to seek support when needed and validate their feelings. Recognize that your spouse’s mental health is just as important as your own.
Relationship Strain
68% of physician spouses/partners report relationship strain.
The demand of medical careers can put a strain on relationships. Long hours, emotional fatigue, and limited quality time take their toll. Strong leadership plays a critical role here by championing programs that support open communication and fostering relationships to help couples strengthen their bond despite these challenges.
What can be done?
Healthcare Systems/Medical Programs:
Provide education for physicians and families to help navigate the strains of medical life, including communication tools. Offer resources to help physicians manage work-life balance. Create policies that help reduce the stress on family life.
Medspouses/Partners:
Communicate openly with your spouse about your relationship and the challenges you’re facing. Make an effort to connect regularly and seek mutual solutions. Be patient and understanding as both of you work through relationship strains together.
Physicians:
Acknowledge the stress your career places on your relationship and address it openly. Work together to identify ways to manage relationship strain without adding further pressure.
Household Responsibilities
More than 60% of spouses/partners say they’re the default parent, over 70% say they’re managing the house alone.
Being the default parent means shouldering the majority of the mental load of the household and childcare responsibilities, which can take a significant toll on the spouse/partner’s mental and physical health. This imbalance often leaves to feeling overburdened, unsupported, and resentful.
Understanding this dynamic is essential to addressing the broader well-being of healthcare providers. It’s important to recognize that stress isn’t just happening with physicians—their spouses/partners are taking on extra responsibilities at home while also dealing with the weight of their own obligations and stress.
What can be done?
Healthcare Systems/Medical Programs:
When feasible, implement policies that allow for more flexible hours or support for physician families with childcare or household duties. Create programs or systems that help physicians balance professional responsibilities with family needs.
Medspouses/Partners:
Communicate with your spouse about household responsibilities and find ways to balance the mental load. Set realistic expectations and ask for help when needed.
Physicians:
Contribute to household and familial duties as much as possible, even if it means small gestures. Acknowledge the mental load carried by your spouse and be proactive in helping. Show gratitude for your spouse’s role in keeping the household running smoothly.
Lack of Support from Medical Programs
80% of programs do not have established support for physician families, yet 60% of spouses want alliance programs, and 78% believe support programs would be valuable.
This gap highlights a critical need for institutional change. Physicians and their families deserve more than being left to navigate these challenges on their own. Programs that address mental health, relationship strain, and community-building aren’t just helpful—they’re essential for fostering well-being in physicians and their families, along with improving retention in the medical field.
What can be done?
Healthcare Systems/Medical Programs:
It’s not hard or expensive to implement support for physician spouses/partners—and a little goes a long way. Check out our resources for supporting them, including The MedCommons Circle for Healthcare Systems, which offers a dedicated space for spouses to connect and thrive locally.
Medspouses/Partners:
Advocate for the inclusion of physician families in well-being and support programs within medical training environments. When possible, share your experiences with program leadership to highlight the need for family-focused initiatives. Support and encourage other spouses/partners to come together to raise awareness about this gap.
Physicians:
Support your spouse’s advocacy for program-level change by expressing the need for family support initiatives to your program directors. Encourage your institution to develop programs that include spouses and families in wellness and retention efforts. Help raise awareness about the impact your family has on your professional life and overall well-being.
Moving Forward
Over the past two years, significant data has been gathered to emphasize the critical need to support physician spouses and partners, reinforcing the importance of their well-being in the broader healthcare ecosystem. Stating it in basic terms – their well-being matters.
Here’s the good news- despite the challenges, nearly 75% of spouses and partners reported feeling proud of their spouse being a physician. This pride reflects their resilience and the deep respect they have for their partner’s dedication and impact. The better news, healthcare systems can take quick and cost-efficient steps to address these challenges and contribute to creating a future where physician families feel supported, valued, and connected, leading to improved overall physician well-being.
If you’re a healthcare system looking to better support physician families, we’d love to connect—this is a conversation we’re passionate about! You can also subscribe to our newsletter for more insights and resources.